Participant Observer: Day of Compassion

It’s funny to me that as many times as we hear the “live like it was your last day” and “treat others as you would like to be treated” lecture, we maybe live only a few number of days in our lives like this. I decided that I wanted to complete the Day of Compassion, because I think I could use a little more in my life, or a lot of more. If you were to ask me any day before last week if compassion was one of my traits, I would tell you in a heartbeat yes, but writing this blog today, I can tell you that I actually found I dislike many of my usual daily actions because I don’t live life compassionate enough. Completing this assignment, I realized quickly through my day that compassion is not about being kind so you don’t hurt others feelings or being that person who never does wrong, it is about doing things focused towards the greater good of others in a manner which is understanding of how your actions will impact those around you and your environment. To be quite honest, I had to retrial my day of compassion, because I failed miserably at first. It is scary to realize how self-concerned I am on a regular basis, even with just the little things like getting angry at the dogs for playing to rough or being upset at that baby crying in the store. I decided on my retrial, I needed to work strongly on my empathy, which is the understanding of another person’s views and feeling compassionate towards that person because of this understanding (Davis et al., 2004).  I used Davis and colleagues idea of empathy to really live my day as if I was living it through the eyes of others around me. 

I began my day as usual, I woke up, ate breakfast, let the dogs out, made sure to give them a good head pat before walking out of the door, and I headed off to the shelter early that morning for my internship not only to get hours, but with the idea in mind that I would act in prosocial behaviors towards all of the dogs this morning. According to Brief and colleagues, prosocial behaviors are the action we engage in which are meant to benefit those around us. I completed the enrichment toy/activity as usual, but instead of just throwing the item in their run, I took the time to say hello to each dog individually, and when I could not get out of a run because the dogs were blocking the door, I did not get angry with the dogs, instead I tried to find a way to guide their attention toward the other side of the run. This experience was both positive for the dogs and for me. Then I went to school, and as I was riding my pirate bike to class, I noticed a girl who looked as if they were in a rush, and her backpack was slowing her down, so I pedaled back around towards her and asked if she wanted my bike to get a faster ride since we were going downhill. I told her I was not in a rush, and she seemed really grateful for my offer. I think this experience provides evidence which support the empathy-altruism hypothesis (Batson, 1991). The empathy-altruism hypothesis states that when we see someone in need, feelings of concern develop for them and we engage in actions which we believe will increase their well-being. The opposite side of this hypothesis occurs when we do not believe someone is in need, therefore, we worry about our own well-being. According to Batson, the outcome that occurred for my situation was of satisfaction because of the decrease in stress of the girl I assisted.

As I continued my day, not much out of the ordinary occurred like it had this morning, but I continued to keep on my mind thoughts of compassion, and viewing my world from others eyes. Just talking on the phone to my mother, I told her I know that I forget to tell her how much I love and miss her, and how much I appreciate all they do for me, and even that small conversation made her day that much better, which in turn, made me happy. As the day fell to night, I noticed I felt so much better about myself and how my actions were impacting others, putting me into almost a euphoric state, and being in this euphoric state was in turn giving me the desire to continue to do good and help others. I was experiencing the good mood effect, and loving it! The good-mood effect is the idea that being in a good mood will increase the amount of behaviors you do which help others (Isen, 2008). Of course, the day came to an end, I realized that it wasn’t easy to be live, breath, and think compassion every day, it is actually hard work! But if I could implement even just half as much compassion into my daily life as I did that day, I would be satisfied, and I plan to try to reach this goal. Not only did I make a positive impact on others, but I made a positive impact on myself as well, and you can’t argue with that. Anyone that I disclosed this experiment too whom I had interacted with that day told me they just thought I was in a really good mood, which means my personality doesn’t stray too far from the actions I engaged in that day, but there was an apparent difference. I will definitely be recommending this activity to friends and family, as it really puts into perspective how compassion and empathy for others can really bring out the best in everyone.

Until next blog, 

Your Social Psychista 

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Davis, M. H., Soduerlund, T., Cole, J., Gadol, E., Kute, M., & Wiehing. J. (2004). Cognitions associated with attempts to empathize: How do we imagine the perspective of another? Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, 30, 1625 -1635.

Brief, A. P., & Motowidlo, S. J. (1986). Prosocial organizational behaviors. The Academy of Management Review, 11, (4): 710–725.

Batson, C. D. (1991). The altruism question. Hillsdale, NJ: Erlbaum.

Isen, A. M. (2008). Positive affect and decision processese: Some recent theoretical developments with practical implications. In C.P. Haugtvedt, P. M. Herr, & F. R. Kardes (Eds), Handbook of consumer psychology (pp. 273-296). NY: Taylor & Francis.